The Dawson's Creek season came to an end last week so I had to find some other way to entertain myself tonight. I swung over to Yoni's in Tarzana. 1010 101 10010 101 1101 11001. Crack the code.

Memorial Day weekend was memorably immemorable this year. Hui Chin and I swung it at Bar Sinister, a Gothic Club off Hollywood Blvd. Black was the dress code, and a dog collar put you in the "in" crowd.

Among the interesting people we met were Jing (a Thai physics graduate from Cal Tech who danced alone so that she would not injure anyone with her frantic-hand- flailing-help-I'm-drowning dance), Martin (a director of Photography who kept buying us shots of Patron... pronounced Pah-thhrawn. Tron has to be pronounced with a nasal twist.) and Kim (the sweaty trisexual chick in tight leather pants from the midwest). I didn't know how drunk I was at the club until I tried to stand. I would have gotten a tattoo that night had the tattoo place not closed half an hour earlier than usual. We ended up sleeping in the car till I sobered up.

I strolled into the doughnut shop this morning and was assisted by a new USA Doughnut Shop employee. I peered through the thumb-printed, see-no-touch doughnut aquarium for my sugar twistee. My first left to right scan did not churn up any positive results so I had to roll my head the other way, one doughnut at a time. Sophie, my regular sugar twistee handler, knew something was wrong when a shadow of disbelief leaned across my brow. I was at a loss for words for what seemed to be an eternity. Sophie dropped her cleaning duties at the side counter and rushed to the scene of the crime.

"Why don't you have the round sugar doughnut instead?"

I would have been outraged had those words danced from the lips of the new girl. But these were the words of the great Sophie. The girl who knew her doughnuts. It was a leap of faith, but one I knew I had to take someday.

Sophie introduced a new pallette into her hair and was surprised that I noticed and acknowledged the new hazel streaks staining her lock. I would have loved to compliment her on the new do but I was in too honest of a mood. I just didn't think her new head was her. The new girl, the old girl with the new hairstyle, the uncharacteristic sugar twistee shortage. Have things changed or has my life become stagnant?

After a marvellous weekend in San Diego, dragging my draggy butt to work on a sweltering hot Monday morning is a bitter pill to swallow. SD is two and a half hours closer to the equator but it is 20 degress cooler down there than it is up here in the valley.

I can see a bunch of road workers from my window being scorched by the big blow torch in the sky. They almost look like shrimp on a Tepanyaki grill. If the A/C were to go out for 5 minutes here in the office, there would be an outrage and everyone would start crying like babies in wet diapers.

My smiley weekend was somewhat marred by a twat deprived cop who issued me a $340 parking ticket. I parked my car in the blue for awhile to squeeze some cash from my already dehydrated ATM account. I was only a few feet away, my car engine was still grumbling... heck I could have been out of there faster than the milkman out the window following a husband's return.

And to further establish himself as a world class dick head, the police officer opted to give Bob a ticket as well. Bob was still in his car, his engine was running and we were all on our way to Bob's brithday dinner.

Other highlights of my weekend include Jen Skanky pouring beer all over my face when she attempted to stream beer into my mouth as I lay on the ground, Brian Murray getting naked at the Boulevard, finding April's bra in the morning and Ketty feeding me Kellogg's Corn Pops with her toes.

I've been spun around so much at work today I think I caught a glimpse of my ass crack. We launched the new PDS web site today. Two web sites actually since we have a Flash and an HTML version.

I wonder if it should be "a HTML" or "an "HTML". Anyone who has the answer to that question can email me with that piece of their mind.

I'll be spending the weekend in San Diego. Yeah! (Pelvis pump). Red Channel Revue will be performing at The Boulevard.

I gave my apartment a makeover this weekend. The new addition to the apartment comes in the form of a big black table that is a tad to big for my already cramped living room. Julian and Hui Chin call it the v.i.r.g.i.n sacrificial table.

About an hour ago, I realized that the table was a little crooked and opted to move it by myself. I kinda dragged the darn thing over my foot when my arms lost strength and dipped for a split second. The cut was pretty long and deep. It's really odd how you sometimes cut yourself so deep but there isn't any blood for the first 15 seconds. And you just stare at the injury awaiting the inevitable.

After the incident, I just looked at the gash and said, "Okay, I know you're going to bleed like a mofo. Just hurry it up will ya. Some of us have things to do here." And then all of a sudden it just pours out and I go, "Oh, shit!," as I desperately snatch at every piece of absorbent material within my reach to try and plug the leak.

The wind was really strong today in the valley and it was pretty hazardous driving home. My car was tossed around like a little round piece of styrofoam in a wind tunnel. Praise the gods lucky hardcore Braveheart fans chose to stay home today.

A funny thing happened at the office today. As always, there was dead silence in the MIS office at PDS. Then all off a sudden, there's a large thump on the window. John, Sam and I get up from our chairs and peer over the edge of the window. We see a crow on the ground... dusting itself out of a daze. And tail between its legs, the silly crow flaps its bent out of shape wings and flies away as discretely as possible, hoping that no one bore witness to the embarassing mishap.

"I guess someone actually cleans the windows in the building," John chuckled.

This is one of my theories on the situation. The crow probably saw its own reflection in the window, thought it was its long lost twin brother, and then excitedly opted to progress foward. The silly bird probably even slowed the flapping of its wings to duplicate the melodrama of corny love story scene where two lovers drift into each others arms in slow mo. And then whamm!!

My other theory is that the crow probably bought Amazon stock at $120 and intentionally rammed itself against the glass out of anger or in an attempt to end its own life.

Ken has a party at his house. This one was under control, however. This time I didn't run throught the screen door and Maribeth did not get pregnant.

The Lakers are in game 5 of a five game series against the Sacramento Kings. There should not even be a game five. They won the first two games with authority and needed only one more. I guess no one knew how to perform the Heimlich in game 3 and 4. It is Cinco de Mayo today.

It's 1 in the morning. Technically it's already the 4th but what the heck. Tonight was a big night. First off, I shot a perfect game of pool tonight for the second time in my entire life. Secondly, Dawson found out about Pacey and Joey having a thing for each other. Okay, I think I just lost all two of my fans of this site. Many people think it's uncharacteristic for me to be watching Dawson's Creek but I totally disagree with them because I think it is characteristic of me to be uncharacteristic. The only advice I have for the young people out there is give the show a chance. There are episodes of Dawson's Creek with flashes of utter brilliance worth the social persecution that may accompany DC discipleship. But I have to admit, there are some really corny episodes that even I find hard to forgive.